August 21, 2016

Should I Tell One of My Girl Friends About Our Messy Past?

 

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Welcome to Ask Poppy! I’m Poppy, your go-to girl for all of life’s woes. And when I say ALL, I MEAN IT. I’m not an expert on anything except maybe for being me, which makes me totally qualified to do this.

 

Hi, Poppy!

I need your help and it starts with a long-ass backstory. My best friend Chris and I used to be like brothers. We always had each other’s back—from school problems, to family problems, and our love lives. He started dating Rhi in college, which I didn’t really approve of in the beginning because I knew about this girl’s history. They fell in love and for some reason, I ended up rooting for them as a couple—maybe because I didn’t have a choice but to support my best friend, right? Later on, they broke up and Chris tried to mend his broken heart by hooking up with Serena from our barkada who was also going through a breakup with her long-time boyfriend Drake, who BTW also belongs in the same group.

Anyway, Chris and Serena’s short-lived relationship did not work out and the ones who knew about it just agreed never to bring it up—including me who seems to be the only one who knows all sides. Fast forward to adulthood, some of my friends drifted apart, but I remained good friends (heck, we’re best friends now!) with Rhi and Serena.

Recently, Serena announced that she’s engaged to Drake (he now knows about everything) and obviously Chris is not invited to the wedding—but Rhi doesn’t understand why because she knows nothing about what happened in the past.

Now my dilemma is trying to figure out if now’s the perfect time to finally tell Rhi about everything. Because she’s the only one out of the loop. And one night when we were all out drinking, I almost slipped and told her everything when she asked why Chris was not invited to the wedding. What do I do? Help me, Poppy!

—Mandy

Dear Mandy,

Can’t you find better friends? Are your lives being conceived by Stephane Savage and Josh Schwartz? You sound like a show that Netflix Philippines would love to throw their money at. It feels like a regional content goldmine.

For the first time in like, ever, I had to make a chart just to make sure that I was connecting the right characters. I know we can’t publish the said chart because I made it with Yassi Pressman’s bald head, but Photoshopped with different wigs to represent each person in your effed up barkada.

It does sound complicated, but the Yass Chart helped me greatly in following your intense saga. First of all, Mandy, you should tell Rhi. I mean this was years ago. You’re like probably on the tenth season and this happened way back in season two. Aren’t you, like, sisters? Pretty sure your friendship with Rhi and Serena had some major improvements. You gals have matured na naman, diba?

And so, gather ‘round, little kiddies and discuss the past like it is nineteen kopong-kopoong. Mandy, the way I see it, Chris and Serena’s time together is pretty safe because there’s no overlap. Chris broke up with Rhi and Serena was moving on from Drake at that time. I mean, sure, it’s so CW of those guys to hook up KNOWING that you’re just in one barkada. How liberated of you peeps. Grabe, I’m kind of impressed, mga iha. So, ayun na nga, those two were free to do whatever they wanted at that point. It feels like a big deal because you guys never talked about it.

Drake knows what’s up and to be honest, this entire thing is about Serena and Drake. Not about you, mga ‘teh. It’s their thing and you should understand that the past might be cool with the soon-to-be-married couple,pero that doesn’t mean that they’re chill with Chris.

Holy sh*t, Mandy, aren’t you like totally glad that you did not get with Chris? Consider yourself safe from all that drama.

This week, I’ve been feeling like trash because I did nothing else but watch Terrace House, Netflix Japan’s version of Big Brother. Instead of ostracizing the contestants from the entire world, the young adults of Terrace House are encouraged to live as they would, with only a minor consequence: that they should live in a house together. So, like, three guys and three girls forced to live with cameras following them.

It is a pretty binge-y show, eerily reminiscent of that time when I was really into Laguna Beach. Main difference is that they’re Japanese so they’re so goddamn respectful. These beautiful people would lounge around, flirt, and drink, and talk about their dreams.

I say respectful because they are really honest about their feelings. And they bow a lot. No, but the thing about them is that they really say what they feel. They’re really confrontational and they say it as it is. Sure, Poppy, it sounds like fabricated stuff made for TV, but I would like to think that it’s not.

You guys are pretty much the opposite of those kids at Terrace House. You’re all secrets and drama and repressed emotions and sleeping around. The President would probably call you immoral, but we all know that’s just how normal human beings are.

Y’all should just dump Chris. Chris is the root of all evil in this narrative. Exclude him. You just need to bring Rhi to a happy place. Probably get her drunk after the wedding. But not too drunk that she passes out. The bomb that you’re going to drop is sure to sober her up naman. I think it is imperative that you do this after the wedding because we really don’t know how she would react. Dami nang drama, and then you’ll reel more in pa during the wedding if Rhi goes psycho.

If she does get mad at Serena, what difference does it make? Serena had been forgiven by Drake, and they’ve got a pretty sweet future ahead of them, existing in a timeline where Chris is out of the picture, so I guess Rhi should just accept that it happened and y’all should just move on and be all mature adults.

I was joking when I said that you need better friends. You’ve been chosen to live with this crazy bunch. Just stick around those who matter and you will be fine, Mandy.

Always,

Poppy

 

Got a question for Poppy? From love and relationships to weird questions you dare not ask even your psychologist, Poppy is ready to answer them all. Send in your questions to ask.poppy@yahoo.com or post your question over Twitter or Instagram with the hashtag #AskPoppy, and you just might get the answer you are looking for.

Disclaimer: The views expressed here are solely those of the author in her private capacity and do not in any way represent the views of Preen.ph, or any other entity of the Inquirer Group of Companies. 

Photo courtesy of Pixabay

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Advice, advice column, Ask Poppy, breakup, Chart, cheating, culture, CW, engagement, Friends, friendship, Group of Friends, japan, manila, Netflix, Netflix Japan, Organizational Chart, Photoshop, Poppy, Preen, Preen.ph, proposal, reality show, relationships, Saga, Sex, Terrace House, TV show, wedding, Yassi Pressman



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